Karl Dorrell Farewell Season Drinking Game

by trojan killing greek guy on Sep 17, 2007 5:37 AM PDT

Bumped from the diaries. GO BRUINS. -N

If Saturday was any indication, this will not be a fun season for UCLA fans. Karl Dorrell football is just not fun. In order to make this season somewhat more enjoyable, I submit to you the "Karl Dorrell Farewell Season Drinking Game." Use whatever beverage you like, but please stay away from the kool-aid.

Take a drink anytime any of the following happens:
*    Dorrell appears on screen and he's not doing sh_t (drink twice if he has anything stuffed down his pants).
*    You shake your head in dismay, bury your head in your hands or yell at the screen because of the game.
*    Our opponent breaks off a 30+ yard play against Walker's impregnable defense.
*    Run-Run-Pass successfully ends in a three and out. Try not to cry.
*    One of our tailbacks slams into a clusterf_ck of linemen for no gain.
*    If you happen to be watching GameDay and Corso and Herbstreit pick against us, take a shot.
*    We kick a field goal.
*    You see a shirt or sign critical of Dorrell in the broadcast.
*    An announcer mentions "the hotseat."

Finish what you have in front of you if:
*    Dorrell is shown literally turning a corner.
*    Karl Dorrell says we have to "execute better" or makes some other inane comment going into the locker at half.
*    You start thinking Dorrell might not be that bad after all. You should know better by now.

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of BruinsNation's (BN) editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of BN's editors.

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Comments

Wow

this drinking game is a one way ticket to alcohol poisoning.

by Tydides on Sep 16, 2007 11:04 PM PDT 0 recs

Great article

with these rles we'll all die of alcohol posioning and won't be around for the day we're all waiting for. The day he's fired and a competant coach comes in to lead us to glory.

by ryebreadraz on Sep 16, 2007 11:05 PM PDT 0 recs

I'm still laughing, epic post

By my count I would have only had to take 55-60 drinks saturday and that's being conservative. If I really do the math with this post as my scorecard I wouldn't be surprised if the mark reached 100 next saturday. In a way it's a way to celebrate our 100 national titles.

by Dorrellian on Sep 16, 2007 11:16 PM PDT 0 recs

Sorry Guys

I'm already on my way to AA.

by BruinFan1 on Sep 16, 2007 11:35 PM PDT 0 recs

Dorrell Drinking Game: It'll Getcha Drunk!

Just trying to make a bitter pill a little easier to swallow. Maybe pick and choose a few rules, I don't want anyone to ingest lethal amounts of alcohol. I thought perhaps Dorrell's final season might not be so bad if it was partially lost in an alcoholic fog.

by trojan killing greek guy on Sep 16, 2007 11:48 PM PDT 0 recs

LOL

This is great stuff.

by Barnes2JJ on Sep 17, 2007 5:29 AM PDT 0 recs

We did the Dorrell Cliche drinking game....

when KD came on TV for his pre-2nd half interview. We didn't have time to get shots out, so we just decided to take a big drink of our beer for every cliche.

KD didn't disappoint, we counted 7-8 cliches in the 30 second interview. If you taped the game, go back and listen to it..... a total joke.

by bornagainbruin on Sep 17, 2007 7:16 AM PDT 0 recs

Genius

this has to be one of the all time greatest posts.

I would like to steal (borrow?) the idea and propose that we have a "Farewell from the University Karl" Tour, otherwise known as the "FU Karl" Tour. Every Pac-10 campus that we play at this year should host a gathering with signs and everything celebrating Karl's last year on the job, wishing him well in his next endeavor, toasting his non-success, etc. Fans at each road game can talk about their favorite Karl moments (Arizona can relive the glorious 2005 game, SC the 7 years before the 2007 game, etc.) and what having Karl at UCLA has meant to them.

First stop on the FU Karl Tour 2007-Oregon State!

Alternatively, we can have our own FU Karl Tour stop at the Rose Bowl for every home game. We can print T-Shirts for the FU Karl Tour, host parties, and generally do all that we can to make Karl's last year at UCLA a memorable one.

Everyone agree?

by Koach Karl I on Sep 17, 2007 7:27 AM PDT 0 recs

LOL

I actually think this is a good idea. Rather than make it seem like we're trying to push him out, just assume he's already gone and "thank" him for his services at the games with signs and shirts. I'm sure that'll draw attention.

by Tydides on Sep 17, 2007 8:48 AM PDT up 0 recs

Fantastic idea

Very funny and clever, too.

by Barnes2JJ on Sep 17, 2007 8:57 AM PDT up 0 recs

Maybe...

we can get the band to play "Thanks for the Memories" at the end of each game as he walks (I mean ducks out) off the field.

by UCngLA on Sep 17, 2007 9:11 AM PDT 0 recs

KD drinking game

Folks,

I gave up alcohol in 1988 when California came up with new DUI laws. I feared for my own legality as I wandered home again after hosting some party or the other for clients after work. Incidentally, while a UCLA student, we all found the nearest keg starting Thursday night, and stayed with it until Monday morning. I have had two close friends from those days who have died from the alcohol poisioning mentioned here, and another has had shock therapy from time to time to deal with his alcohol issues...word to the wise and seasoned veteran...

So, I could join in the drinking game, with my non-alcoholic drink, but the only downside for me would be more trips to the bathroom. My kidneys might not be able to handle it!!!
Bill

BillSouthBay

by BillSouthBay on Sep 17, 2007 9:43 AM PDT 0 recs

I second this

I had a little difficulty getting home one night in 1991, and after lots of legal things went on, the last "suggestion" from the judge was don't drink.

And I haven't since 1991. I'm sure no one (but Bill) will believe this, but life is much better without alcohol. You know what happens at the end of things. You never wake up with a headache (or if you do you know you're getting sick from too much guacamole). You never have to worry about a designated driver, because you're it.

Plus, I am very confident that most everyone is not quite as cute and clever and funny when they're drunk as they think they are. Stay sober once at a party and you'll find out what I mean.

Two more points from Bill's notebook: Gino Pellici and Al Hein were buddies of mine in the army in Germany. Each got blasted at his short-timer's party the day before he was to return home, each got in a car crash, and each died. That's two guys who I knew. Bruins, you don't have to drink. I just ask that you try it once and see.

by Fox 71 on Sep 17, 2007 10:06 AM PDT up 0 recs

Sobering points on a silly , but funny, drinking

game idea. For those who don't drink, like me, I'd suggest substituting a dollar bill for each example of a drink - plop down a dollar instead of downing a drink.

By the end of the Washington game it would be just terrific if there was just enough cash on the table to go out to celeberate a win at Wendy's :) If the game ends up as badly as the Utah game you might have enough cash to commiserate at a swanky restaurant :(

by bruinhawk on Sep 17, 2007 10:21 AM PDT up 0 recs

Read this on EDSBS

"Lloyd has kittens, Charlie has cheeseburgers."

... and Dorrell has his kool-aid!

editor, DumpDorrell.com ... formerly posted as DumpDorrell

by BruinCore on Sep 17, 2007 9:52 AM PDT 0 recs

Deadspin is on to us as well

http://deadspin.com/sports/blogdome/angry-bruins-300367.php

by bruinhoo on Sep 17, 2007 11:53 AM PDT up 0 recs

Drinking Game

Well, I always said Dorrell would drive me to drink! :)

I may work with the Waves, but I'm still a Bruin!

by HoozierDaddy on Sep 17, 2007 10:08 AM PDT 0 recs

Fox71

Another good post from Fox71. I am the designated driver, and have the same good time at parties that I had when I did drink. I sleep better too. My close friend who has had shock treatments and other therapy graduated from UCLA, earned his CPA, and works, get this, as a baggage handler at LAX. It is the only job he can have where if you don't show for work, they will tolerate it, because he never knows when he will go off the wagon. His older brother has been getting the calls all these years from either the police or hospitals in Los Angeles. "We have a man here with a card in his pocket that says to call you"..... tough duty.
Bill

BillSouthBay

by BillSouthBay on Sep 17, 2007 10:44 AM PDT 0 recs

The only thing

that keeps me semi-happy is looking at that Kool-Aid picture of Dorrell. It cracks me up everytime.

I am so incensed about this so-called coach that I am almost interesting in delving into this possible myth that he is such a great guy.

I am not saying he is a criminal or a bad guy, but why does everyone think he is such a nice guy? Because his pants are clean and neatly-pressed and he's trim and fit? And if he's such a great guy, why can't he take some responsibilty for his own horrible coaching effort, not to mention the loser staff he has assembled?

Give me slob Toledo in his golden years at UCLA any day.

by Barnes2JJ on Sep 17, 2007 10:44 AM PDT 0 recs