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UCLA: The Easiest High Profile College Football Gig In America

So why is one of the worst coaches in college football smiling in Westwood?


Photo Credit: carlojai's photostream(flickr)

Because UCLA happens to be easiest place to coach among high profile college football gigs in America. Here are just some of the reasons:

  1. One of the best universities in the country.

  2. Best location in America (city/weather, etc).

  3. In the middle of one of the best recruiting bases in America.

  4. Best overall sports program in America.

  5. You can go 7-6 with your "best team yet" in your 4th year and still not get fired.

  6. You can have all your own players quit on you in an embarrassing 44-6 loss to a weak MWC team and STILL keep your job.

  7. You know the answer to number 6 so you can still sleep well at night.

  8. You don't need any social skills when talking to the media.

  9. You can spend all off-season golfing.

  10. You aren't accountable for hitting the goals that both you and the administration set-up when you were hired, even when you miserably miss these goals.

  11. You have literally dozens of coaches and players to take the blame for you when things go wrong.

  12. You only have to wear your best suit once - to the interview.

  13. There aren't many bells on campus, and the ones that are there are rarely rung. So no one expects you to have to answer them.

  14. "Troy Aikman isn't going to walk through that door."

  15. Even after a miserable career here, you still have supporters! (not anyone on this site, but at games I have met too many!)

  16. UCLA has many libraries with many books, so you can always make sure that you are on the same page.

  17. Wilshire, Sunset, Hillgard, Westwood, you will bound to find a bus to throw someone under.

  18. The sports media can be counted on to forget that your predecessors beat the "invincible" SUC eight years in a row and act like UCLA has ALWAYS been LA's second-best football team.

  19. UCLA's English Department comes in handy when you can't adequately express yourself in all of those press conferences. Oh, wait...

  20. Remembering administration staff birthday's is more important than winning football games.

  21. No need to actually read playcharts so long as they are tucked firmly in your pants.

  22. The headcoach gets to wear those electric ear warmers that look just like the headsets worn by real coaches.

  23. Only place where you can lose and claim that you have brought the UCLA tradition back.

  24. There are plenty of deer in the mountains nearby ... so you can practice your deer-in-the-headlights look with the real deal.

  25. The headcoach gets to wear those electric ear warmers that look just like the headsets worn by real coaches.
Huge HTs to bornagainbruin, BruinCore, hbruin84, bluegold, Chandler, Ajax, Tydides , and tasser10 for coming up with some of these in yesterday's thread.

If you have more to add throw it up in this thread.

GO BRUINS.